Mabel

Her name was Mabel Cross
And she smoked cigarettes
Grey bloomed between her lips
And bruises wore her neck

She smiled at me once
When I was in the dinner line
And I spent three days replaying it
In the cinema of my mind

She kissed me there, in the real one
Halfway through the matinee
It was the saddest war film
We got heckled to behave

She made romance in the silly things
And love in every room
We fucked everywhere in her house
And on the grass below the moon

Chorus
Mabel
My baby, Mabel
I still think about you, hope you know
Mabel
My darling, Mabel
Why oh wow did you tell me to go?

She kissed me in the falling dark
With sand beneath our legs
I had on all my finery
Dress pressed and lipstick red

We tasted salt of open sea
And breeze tousled her locks
We spent the night under the sky
Collecting shells and rocks

She led me to the ocean
It was cold and froze my legs
She told me she would warm me up
But then kissed me instead.

I told her she’s my darling
And she said she loved me too
Perhaps that’s what this ‘being’ means
No one else, the world, and you.

Chorus

Mabel
My baby, Mabel
I got your text just thought I’d let you know
Mabel
My darling, Mabel
I’m in my car, to meet you I go

I Don’t Think Cupid Met Us

I wish that you would hold me,
As dusk brings the end of day,
And all my aching troubles,
Would get up and fade away.

Like shadows they would leave me,
Cast long in evening air,
But then you switch the light on,
And the shadows go elsewhere.

Darling, reach inside me,
There’s a storm behind my eyes,
I’m trapped in life and body,
I’ve grown crooked, to despise.

Take the fire out, leave me empty,
And kiss the stars goodnight,
I will blur the lines of emptiness,
Or calm behind the eyes.

If you held me I’d die happy,
I could pass soundly in my sleep,
I just need to think that if I did,
Over me you’d weep.

And I’d look down from three feet up,
And smile softly too,
That I didn’t waste twenty years,
But when you leave I know I do.

From the Sirens Who Fell in Love With the Sailors Instead

I’m hanging between your fingers
Like a puppet on a string
I’ll do anything that you wanted
I’ll do any goddamn thing

I used to stand still like the rocks
But the oceans were stronger than me
Storms came and waves hit
And now I lay in the sea

I’m brittle sand at the shoreline
Shape me into what you want
I’ll do anything that you wanted
You won’t believe there was fight in me once

And one day I will be happy
Underneath the sea
Let waves crash
Let storms brew
Above and beyond me

The rest rest with dirt past your elbows
And soil above their heads
While I’ll choke on fish bones
In my salty seawater bed

The ocean has made me a promise
A pact and a truce if you will
It’ll take me beneath folding waves
I promised it that I’ll behave

No turning back
No turning back

I’ve swam out quite a way now
My feet are touching the floor
You won’t find me my darling
You won’t see me anymore
You can’t rescue me this time
You can’t rush through the door
I’m opening my mouth now
The damage is already done
Don’t wait for me at the coastline
Listen, please, just run.

Heidi

[Wow I managed to write a song that wasn’t about a subject matter entirely horrendous. Unrequited love is more conventional, at least]

There are words between my lips
Words that I dare not say
I think of love and years
Of recalling yesterday.

I may be foolish but not stupid
Yes I fell in love with a ghost
I’ll try and purge you from my memory
Yes I’ll do my utmost.

Maybe that’s what sets me apart
From all the other guys
Who slept with you one winter day
And fell in love with your eyes.

They didn’t look away quick enough
They fell into a trance
And thought Heidi’s really lovely
I’m sure she’ll give me a chance.

No, me I know your power
I was out the door that night
I thought about you as I crossed the road
At the green traffic lights

You make my mind so silly
And you make my heart cry loud
But I know that it is fruitless
I’m just another in a crowd.

There are realms of guys who love you
In every town and every place
That you’ve ever graced your presence
In silken skirts, lipstick and lace

I’m really not that special
I’m mediocrity at best
Unexceptional to you
Yes I’ll fade into the rest.

Some days I think about you
If you’re cov’ring something up
That’s why you pick up people put them down
Like we put down coffee cups

Is there a hole inside your ribcage?
Where a broken heart does beat?
And a voice in your head that tells you
To throw yourself a thousand feet

I may not be as pretty
Or have the same way to cope
But Heidi please just listen
Just know you’re not alone

You deserve a nicer world
And you deserve a kinder mind
An inside voice as lovely
As the one you use outside.

I don’t expect one thing from you
Not a smile not a kiss
Oh I just want you better
You’d be terrible to miss.

Summer Wine

A line of kisses down my front,
The stitching from my head to heart,
Where you live amongst the scarlet,
As if I knew you from the start.

Your skin’s the shade of fresh milk,
The top – the froth beneath the lid,
Spoiled, with bruises like,
The fruit the farm hands hid.

If your neck is peach your hair is lemons,
Squeezed for the finest lemonade,
Tart – not bitter – the colour of summer,
For dizzy dreams beneath the shade.

I lay beside the fallen trunk,
Delirious from pollen and drunk on wine,
I’m in heaven when I’m here with you,
Wishing for a stretching, endless time.

But your eyes flutter open, widen still,
Push willow leaves behind your ear,
I’m sorry, I really should get going
Into the evening light you disappear.

Our Epic

Rest easy my darling
Let the earth part ways for you
Like the Red Sea or Galilee
And the storm you’re working through.

Don’t look to angry rain clouds
I’ll be your shelter if you ask
The sturdy trunk of an oak tree
From a time that’s come to pass.

Let my arms hold you like branches
Like the boughs of blossom bare
And lush green leaves and berries please
The smell of Autumn there.

I’ll stay with you through rainfall
And every storm of spring
I’ll stay through scorch and desert heat
Hardship, years, everything.

There’s a light at the end of the tunnel
So watch your step and mind the glass
I’ll hold your hand along the way
These times will come to pass.

We will one day reach an opening
And sun will simmer on your skin
We’ll sob into each others arms
We made it oh we made it

Together

You are still beside me
I am sat and you are laid
We are both so silent
But you in different ways.

Your sallow skin is parchment pale
Your once gentle hands are cold
Your body’s filled with tragedy
You were eighteen years old.

I know we took no vows out loud
But it feels so wrong to part
I crave a happy middle
Like I craved a happy start.

What if I just lay here?
Shut my eyes and count to ten
Fade into the nothing
Happy, when I meet you there.